We have been in a winter weather advisory for the past week. I attempted to get out and about today for a birthday party. Quickly discovered my Yukon doesn’t have the oomph to make it a half mile west to hwy 103. We were almost instantly stuck in a drift. Brock and I attempted to dig me out for an hour by shovel and realized the wind was just going to keep drifting us right back in.
It was very trying and honestly brought me to a conversation with God that I’ve been sharing a lot with coworkers lately. One of the nurses calls moments that He comes to us as “God Winks”, which I personally really like and will refer to them as such moving forward.
I am completely honest when I tell you, I was physically exhausted and this was very much wearing on me emotionally. A lot of thoughts and feelings were coming to the forefront and everything that has felt stacked against me since August when I started to experience the rheumatoid arthritis symptoms started to consume me. Life has just been one thing after another and I have tried my hardest to be positive and optimistic, but dang, it’s been T.O.U.G.H.
So here I am emotionally maxed out and frustrated that I put myself in this predicament. As we shoveled and shoveled over and over again, I kept seeing trucks stop at the county line half mile east and just sit there and watch us and I was so upset that these big trucks were not coming to our aid. So as I jumped back in the Yukon one more time to try to get unstuck I said out loud, “okay God show me how mighty you really are” but it wasn’t genuine, it was very spiteful and in a way challenging His power….
Why? Because I felt the weight of the past six months stacked up against me and I was 100% powerless to everything up to this moment. I realized that I was in the wrong as soon as this came out of my mouth. I was ashamed and told myself that I knew He would get me through this, just like everything else He already has.
I eventually gave up the struggle and went home to grab the truck. I did what I knew to do and taught Brock a thing or two about the power of Mother Nature when you’re behind the wheel, how to rock the vehicle if you don’t have help, things to watch for when trying to get unstuck, pulling a vehicle with a rope, etc. It made me proud to have parents that never treated us girls like we were incapable of doing things on our own, especially things that most guys only know. Everything worked out and both the Yukon and the truck were parked where they belong.
As I sat in the doorway at home trying to get my overalls off, my arms shaking and my back aching, I leaned against the door to stop myself from bawling. I hurt and not just in a physical way. Just then Jake called me and told me a neighbor was plowing from the west to the east on Van Dorn and got stuck in a six foot drift coming up the hill from by the pond. I looked out the kitchen window and saw him.
This was a God Wink!!!
Those people didn’t come to my rescue because God knew what I couldn’t see. I didn’t realize it in the moment because I was so consumed with the circumstances, but God was with me. He knew I was capable and He helped me work through every bit of it all with Brock by my side. How awesome is that? I felt so sorry for myself at one point and it changed when I grabbed the rope and truck. I recall thinking to myself, sometimes you just have to be your own hero, but God was the hero here. Some circumstances are meant to change the things around us, some are meant to change us!!!
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